100 ml of Vanilla Essence

Late this evening I am fixing the recycling to take out while my DW unpacks the shopping. After a lull in the conversation there comes a statement I really didn't expect....

"I need to get some vodka."

Now to explain; my DW detests alcohol to the extent that even desserts(Think Achilles' heel) with the slight taste of the alcoholic generally gets the thumbs down... (You may not appreciate the true magnitude of this statement...)

So when this chance motion was put forth, two things came to mind;

Firstly, I scanned over the conversation during the evening, (those parts I could remember at least), considering whether it gave any indication of earthquakes / airplane crash's / fires in her craft room... but nothing came to mind - and usually these type of things make some kind of impression on this male's memory.... usually.

From which I moved to my second thought.

Oh no... not again .... 
... another natural remedy that avoids the unspeakable forces of evils which are embodied by horrors called colouring and preservatives.

From this reaction came the thought, do I bight?... can I actually resist,... this time can I at least pretend that in someway this makes sense to me so I can leave the kitchen without once again becoming totally  bewildered... after all of about 2 seconds (My willpower apparently has something to be desired) I gave in.

"OK, I give up... how come?"

My DW then proceeds to tell me that all that makes up vanilla essence is vodka and a vanilla bean, and that per 100ml of vanilla essence it's really quite expensive. After some discussion considering the amount that vodka would cost proportionally to the essence we came to the semi conclusion that it would be roughly the same cost. (Working with estimates from two people who know nothing about the actual cost of alcoholic beverages)

From which my DW responds,
"Alright, well we'll just have to make vodka then.What's it made out of?"

I pause and look at her in the vain hope that THIS time she is actually having me on. Somehow the brisk unpacking of goods does not indicate a joke in the making.

So I tentatively answer
ME: "Ummm, potatoes I think..."
DW: "Oh good, they're cheap"
Me(Slightly panicky at this point): "I'm pretty sure that to make any type of spirits you need a still... and that they're illegal for residential use."
DW:" Why!?!"
Me: "Ummm.... high levels of alcohol, high level's of pressure.... residents ... explosions..."
DW: "Oh yea, right... wusses"
Me: "Sorry, we are talking about saving a little money by making vanilla essence aren't we?"
DW: "Yip"

And so continues the crusade against all things unnatural...